Birthday Baby

Birthday Princess

Yesterday I turned 31 years old and it was a very good day. It doesn't feel like an entire year has gone by already since my last birthday (which I was lucky enough to spend in Europe with my best friend). Looking back, the year I turned 30 was probably the best year of my life thus far. In one year I visited 6 new countries and had countless adventures. Before this past year I'd never been out of the United States but now I'm a world traveler! I have fallen madly in love with adventure and I think this love affair will last for the rest of my life. There are so many places I want to see and cultures I want to experience firsthand. But for now, I'd like to take some time to reflect on some things that I learned in my 30th year on this planet.

#1.) Love yourself. This is VERY important. For most of my life I've struggled with truly loving myself. I was always my worst critic and put so much pressure on myself to be "perfect" (which I know is totally unrealistic but is pretty common for people who have anxiety disorder). But this past year I decided to really try to love and accept myself the way that I am. I've been trying to see myself how your best friend sees you. When my friends tell me about all their insecurities and things they don't like about themselves I'm always shocked and want to tell them how beautiful and perfect and amazing they are. I don't see these flaws, I just see a person who I love and think is pretty terrific so I've been trying to see myself that way too. It's weird how your entire perception of life changes when you decide to start loving yourself. In the past when I'd look at my reflection all I could see were things I wanted to change. My ears were too big, my skin had too many imperfections, my hair color was too boring, my bust was too small, etc. But now...Now when I look at myself I see princess, a goddess, a celestial being who is just oh-so-CUTE! I wonder how did I ever see anything otherwise? Of course there are days when I feel negative but they're much more infrequent than they once were.




Birthday Dress & Flower Crown

#2.) Surround yourself with positive people and remove any toxic relationships from your life. The truth is that life is very short and you only get to do it once, so if you're not getting what you need from a relationship and that relationship is no longer adding to the enjoyment and quality of your life, it might be time to let it go. Relationships like people, change over time and just because you've been friends with someone for a long time doesn't mean that you're always going to be compatible. This past year I had to remove some negative influences from my life and although it was hard, I think it was ultimately the right decision. These people weren't treating me the way I know I deserved and weren't making me feel good about myself when I was with them. They made me feel like I wasn't good enough and that I needed to change who I was. Since these people have exited my life, I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted from my shoulders. For the first time in my life I'm surrounded by people who I truly love (and who love me) and enjoy being around. These people support me and inspire me everyday. They make me laugh and are also there for me when I'm feeling down. It's important to find friends who are there for you even when life gets complicated. As a person who struggles with depression, I need people in my life who understand that I'm not always going to happy and bubbly. There are days where I'm going to be a bummer but it means so much to know that even when I feel moody or sad that my friends still love me and are there to talk when I need them. They say that misery loves company but I think that the same can be said about positivity. Surrounding yourself with positive people can really help you to become a more positive person. I've noticed that now that I'm hanging out with positive folks that my attitude has changed a lot. I've absorbed their good vibes and positive energy and instead of just complaining about everything like I used to, I'm laughing and dancing and having fun. It's pretty awesome :)

#3.) Collect experiences, not things. Now this is the hardest one and I'll admit I struggle with it daily. Like I said earlier, people are continually growing and changing and as an artist, I like to express those changes externally with the clothes and makeup I wear. But there comes a point where you realize that with only two days off a week, how are you physically going to be able to wear all of this stuff? And I've heard that the average person only wears 11% of their wardrobe anyway so I need to get a hold of myself and stop buying so much clothes. I come from a family of hoarders so it's going to be challenge to stop collecting things and spending my money on junk I don't really need. Ideally, I'd like to start living a more minimalistic lifestyle and spend my money on travel and not stuff. But as I said, it's not going to be an easy task but now that I've started traveling I'm seeing how much happiness I'm getting from those experiences vs acquiring more material possessions.

So yeah, some very heavy life lessons were learned this past year and I'm hoping to continue to develop and grow this year as well and am very much looking forward to all of the adventures to come.

Baby's First Art Fair

This happened forever and a day ago but since I hadn't finished my travel stories yet, I thought I'd wait to blog about my art show. It was at Monarch Theatre last month and I showed with 42 other local artists. This was my first show as Iggy Starpup so I was very excited/nervous. I spent 2 months preparing so there was a lot of pressure for the show to be a success. For the most part, I'd say it was. The only exception was that I got SUPER sick the day before. Exactly 24 hours prior to the show I woke up with the flu (and I hadn't had the flu in many many years). It was probably a combination of stress and the fact that everyone I worked with was sick but the timing couldn't have been worse. If I hadn't had already sold all of my tickets to my friends I think I would've just backed out to be honest. But I felt an enormous amount of guilt bailing at the last minute. The morning of the show I took some Dayquil first thing after I woke up and by the grace of Glob, it actually worked. Within 30 minutes I felt better. Within an hour I thought, "I can maybe possibly do this." I had to be at the theatre at 2pm and since it was downtown, my dad gave me a lift. He was really worried about me and tried really hard to convince me to not go. It wasn't easy have to socialize with so many people for hours on end but I'm glad I went.

The show didn't start until 7pm so I was a little taken a back when they told us we had to be there at 2pm but our director assured us that we would need all of that time to set up and get photographed. I think it took me about 2 hours total to set up my booth but I did have to wait an hour for someone to help me set up my grid panel (I didn't have a boyfriend/husband to help me set up--I had to do everything myself) so I did end up doing a lot of waiting around. I popped some more Dayquil before they opened the doors and just told myself that I had to get through this. It helped build my confidence that a fellow artist bought a piece of mine before the show even started. Luckily I'd had the good sense to bring a chair with me, though, because there was no way I would've been able to stand for so many hours.

The show went from 7-11pm so it was a long day but it meant so much to me to see all of my friends there to support me. Some were only able to stay for a bit but knowing that they took the time to come downtown to support me and my art meant the world. It was super cool to watch people's face too as they made their way over to my booth. Everyone's faces went from mild interest to delight. I watched them as their eyes jumped from hoop to hoop and as they recognized characters they knew. It was very cool. Our director had told us to anticipate being at the theatre until 1am but I was positive it wouldn't run that long since it was a Thursday and things had thinned out by 10pm. We wrapped up around 10:45pm and I was home by 11:30pm. Even now, I don't know how I got through it being as sick as I was. Just looking at the photographs it's hard to tell that I was even sick but I guess that means I did a pretty good job with my makeup, haha.

In other art news, things have been going pretty well with my shop. I got interviewed recently for an article on a crafting blog and a crafting hero of mine, Twinkie-Chan, purchased one of my hoops! I've been a fan of hers for many many years so it's so cool knowing that she likes my work enough to want a piece in her home. That makes me so happy. In the past year I've befriended so many artists who I really admire and it's all thanks to social media. Even though my addiction to the internet does eat up a lot of my time, I am very grateful for the connections it's allowed me to make. In just 3 years my business has grown so much and I am excited for all of the possibilities and opportunities yet to come :)

Bangkok: Day 7

Our last day in Thailand once again began before the rising sun. It was quite a journey to Elephant's World; I think we left the apartment around 5:30am (aiya!) and took a taxi to the bus terminal. The taxi ride itself turned out to be an adventure! When we told the driver we wanted to get to the bus station he did not look pleased since it would take him out of his normal pick up area but he agreed to take us anyway. The first couple minutes were fine but as soon as we got onto the freeway our driver went completely loco. He was driving almost 100 mph and we had no seat belts in the back seat. I tried my best just to go limp and grip the seat for dear life. At one point the traffic got stopped up a bit but there was a small gap on the left. Our driver decided to gun it and try to make it through that gap but right at that moment the traffic started to move again and the gap closed! All three of us in the back went flying and both me and Pamela screamed EEEEEEEEEEK! as we bashed into the front seat. Since there isn't any car insurance or traffic laws (it's like a free-for-all Mario Kart kind of situation) in Bangkok, our driver just kept on going after bumping into this other taxi. It was so weird. And not once did the guy apologize for almost killing all of us.

We got to the bus terminal around 6am and it was a pretty strange place. First of all, the place was HUGE, so huge that there were a million places to eat. It was kind of like a mall. We had the worst time just figuring out which teller to see to buy tickets for the right bus. By the time we bought our tickets and found where we were supposed to be picked up our bus was already pulling away and would not stop to let us in. Gaaahhh...After about 30 minutes another bus came and we were on our way. It was about a 2 hour bus ride from Bangkok to Kanchanaburi where Elephant's World is so I needed a way to pass the time since I wasn't really sleepy. I mentioned in an earlier post that Thailand is full of wild dogs so I decided that I was going to count them. In 2 hours I counted 105 DOGS! It actually turned out to be a really fun game because it got me to really focus on the scenery instead of just absent mindedly staring out the window. After our bus ride a van was scheduled to pick us up and take us the rest of the way to the elephant sanctuary. The "van" turned out to be large tuk tuk and we rode over with 3 other people. Two were boys from London and the other was a young woman from Paris who was travelling all over south east Asia all by herself. I love all of the interesting people and stories you hear while you're travelling abroad. While riding on the tuk tuk I had another moment where I was like, "Is this real? Am I really riding through the jungle in Thailand on the back of a tuk tuk?" It was a pretty cool experience.

The motto of Elephant's World is "Where the elephants don't work for us. We work for the elephants" and boy, they weren't kidding! Elephants require so much love and care. Just feeding them was an all day endeavor. It was quite the workout! The first thing we did was feed the elephants fruit. To be honest, I was a bit scared since I'd never been so close to such a large animal before. I placed a handful of bananas into her mouth and she gripped my hands a little bit and I thought, "She could just rip my arms right off if she wanted to." I did like the bristly feel of her tongue and trunk, though. It was pretty cool. I never really thought that I'd ever be putting my hand right inside an elephant's mouth! Life is full of surprises. After we fed the elephants they needed a bit of exercise so we walked off the grounds with them. I had only worn flip flops that day since I didn't think I was going to do a lot of walking so it wasn't long before my feet were killing me. But anyway, the elephants were so well behaved and never once got aggressive. Some of them had new mahouts (trainers/keepers) so they weren't exactly both on the same page yet. None of the elephants were bad but some of them just kind of did what they wanted. It was funny.

Another funny thing were all of the doggies that lived at the sanctuary. We asked our guide about them and she told us that they just showed up one day and then never left. They all seemed so happy and got all of the scraps from the kitchen. What a life! Next on our agenda was to prep food for all of the elephants without any teeth. I didn't know this, but an elephant loses its teeth around 60  years old. In the wild they die at this point since they can't feed themselves any longer but at a sanctuary they can live to nearly 100 years old. The oldest elephant was born in 1936! It blew my mind how old many of the elephants were and how sweet they were even after the difficult lives they'd had before they came to Elephant's World.

We all helped make the sticky rice balls for the older elephants and then it was time to feed ourselves. It turned out to be quite the feast! They even had tofu in curry sauce so I was one happy camper. After lunch we rolled the sticky rice balls into actual ball shapes and then headed over to feed it to the old timers. Again I got a little shy about sticking my hand in an elephant's mouth but our guide reassured me it would be fine since she didn't have any teeth (I was more concerned with her trunk whacking me in the face tbh). Pamela wasn't scared, though, so she jumped right in there. The last thing on the agenda was to bathe the elephants. At this part you were allowed to climb up and sit on top of an elephant. Out of everyone I think only Michelle and I didn't partake in this activity. The river the elephants were bathing in was a FOR REAL river with a rushing current and it just seemed to easy to get washed away. On top of that, climbing onto the elephant looked like such a struggle. Pamela volunteered to be the first one to sit on an elephant (she's totally fearless) and soon after she managed to get up there she got kind of bucked off and belly flopped into the river. Michelle busted a gut at this and we both decided that sitting on top of an elephant wasn't something we needed to do in this life. It was very entertaining, though, watching everyone else trying to scramble onto the elephant's backs and then being tossed back into the water. One girl even swam through a fresh pile of elephant poo without really realizing it.

We finished up around 4pm and were going to take the bus back to Bangkok, however, some other people in our tour group were headed in the same direction and asked us to share a van with them. Big mistake. We got stuck in a van with two German girls and they were two of the most obnoxious human beings I've ever had the misfortune of being trapped in a van with. One of them sat in the middle and the other sat in the back and they kept shouting across the van to each other with no consideration that there were other people in the van. One of them even told off the driver because he wouldn't let her stop and smoke a cigarette. There was a ton of traffic on the journey back so it took 3 hours instead of 2 and I had to pee for the majority of the trip. When we finally got back to the city I had no choice but to use a pay toilet before I peed my pants. While I was in the toilet Pamela bought us some snacks and I found myself eating buttered corn out of a plastic bag (it was both surreal and delicious).

So yeah, it was a long day but all in all, a good one that I don't think I'll ever forget. The next morning I would travel back to the states solo (Michelle stayed another week in Thailand). It's not too exciting of a story but I will tell you that I went kind of overboard in the airport gift shop in Tokyo and bought $100 worth of Studio Ghibli products. I was a little afraid to fly back by myself but it turned out to be a piece of cake and now I feel confident that I could fly pretty much anywhere in the world by myself and be okay. Thank you so much for sharing this adventure with me. I hope you enjoyed it (I know I did). My next trip won't be until October where I'll be meeting up with Melissa in London for her birthday. Until then, it's back to living the craft life for me.