San Francisco 2k15

me and 1/4 of the golden gate bridge

This past weekend I went on a mini-break to San Francisco to meet/visit my all-time favorite crafter, Twinkie-Chan (aka Stephanie). When I left Phoenix it was 115 degrees and I was wearing a crop top and shorts. When I arrived in San Francisco it was 66 degrees and WINDY. AS. HELL. It took a while for her to find me since I'd never been to this airport before and wasn't really sure where I was but eventually she found me. The funny thing about being friends with someone online for so long is that when you meet them irl you kind of already know them so it's not exactly the same as meeting someone for the "first" time. As soon as we started talking I felt totally comfortable around her and that I could just be myself. Since I hadn't eaten since lunch (and US Airways gave me no peanuts OR a cookie) I was STARVING when I arrived so we went to a place called Indochine Vegan cuz mama needed some protein in a bad way.

After dinner we went back to her house and I got to meet her doggies Bibi and Bunny and they were soooooo cute! We ended up talking about anything and everything and I don't think I went to bed til 2am (zoinks!). Stephanie's roommate happened to be out of town that weekend so I even got to sleep in a bed. Party. Bonus. The next day we both got dolled up (I even curled my hair) and we drove over to the Golden Gate Bridge. The traffic was kind of a nightmare so getting there took 1,000 hours. When we actually got there we could NOT find a parking space! It was suupppeerrr busy since A.) it was Father's Day weekend and B.) it was a Saturday so we drove around and around until eventually we found a free lot and snagged a space. The moment we got out of the car it was windy as HECK and my curls were instantly blown out. :(



Twinkie Chan and Iggy Starpup

After we'd about frozen our buns off on the bridge (and after I'd petted the most beautiful husky) we headed over to Alamo Park to see the Full House house. Driving in downtown San Francisco was totally terrifying to be honest. The hills were so steep that you couldn't see 15 feet in front of the car and you had to just pray that nobody on a bicycle went flying in front you. We stopped at a few stop lights and the car would lunge backwards a bit when you'd hit the gas. Seattle was the same way and I had a massive anxiety attack every time I had to drive downtown. The weather in SF is pretty cuckoo because by the time we got to Alamo Park it was sunny and nice. There were lots of doggies playing in the park and it was just lovely. We walked over to where the Full House house was and there were all of these fancy people standing in front of it. Welp, it turns out they were having a wedding there so I'm probably going to be in the background of all of their photos taking pics of the house. Whoopsies!



You got it, dude!

The painted ladies were so beautiful but it kind of made me sick imagining how expensive they are. We were taking pics on the steps of the pale blue one and Stephanie was like, "Is is okay for me to sit here? Are they gonna come out as soon as I sit down and yell at me?" and I was like, "NO WAY!" The second after I took her pic like, 3 people came out of the house and we were like OH SHIT! and scurried away :p We had made plans to meet her family in Palo Alto at 5pm for Father's Day dinner and it was about 3pm by then so we decided to hit the grocery store before we headed over so we could make Cap'n Crunch Crispy Treats later.

We got to Palo Alto around 5pm and met her family at a French restaurant called Zola. Being vegetarian I was a bit worried when Stephanie told me we were getting French food because I do know that the French looooove them some meatz. Luckily, there was one vegetarian entrée on the menu so I got the ricotta gnocchi. Her sister in law ordered us some carrots as an appetizer and I remember thinking, "Carrots? Really?" but the carrots turned out to be AMAZING! OHMYGOODNESS! My gnocchi was very good as well, especially these tiny little mushrooms in a brown butter sauce. Mmmmmm...My favorite part of the dinner was getting to meet her nephew. He was sooooo cute and really smart (he could even pronounce my name). I'm not usually a big fan of children but I couldn't take my eyes off him.

When we got back to San Francisco we watched one of my fave shows "My Mad Fat Diary" and made the Cap'n Crunch Crispies. When I make Rice Crispy treats at home I always use 5 cups of cereal instead of 6 like the box says because I think it makes them too dry so when Stephanie and I were making them she asked me to put 6 cups in. I was like, "You're a six cup person? Whaaaa?" and she was like, "That's what the box says." and I was like, "Nah, girl, that's just the suggested amount." Well...as you can imagine they came out HELLA GOOEY. Stephanie was majorly grossed out by the stickiness but it didn't slow me down one bit (truth be told I ate all of them the very next day).

Instax Pics

The next day we went to Japantown cuz mama needed to do some SHOPPING. First we went to Daiso (which if you haven't been, is a Japanese $1.50 store). I'd only been to a Daiso store once before in Seattle so I was really excited to load up on stuff. Oh, man, did I get a lot of stuff. I think I spent $30 so at Daiso that's like a million dollars. Next we popped in and out of various shops (each time Stephanie had to leave her Bobba Tea outside because every store had a "no food or drink" sign, haha). I couldn't resist getting some stickers and a Rilakkuma and Korilakkuma plush from a cute shop called Maido Fine Stationary and Gifts. My favorite part of Japantown, though, was a photo booth place called Pika Pika. I'd been wanting to go to a Japanese photo booth for ages so I was so excited when Stephanie and her bff, Manda, wanted to go with me. I'm glad that they'd been before because it can be pretty intimidating for a first-timer. You pay up front then you go inside a booth. As soon as you touch the screen the timer starts and you have to pick your lighting setting and backgrounds. There's a buttload of choices so you have to decide very quickly. Once it starts taking pictures you have 2-3 seconds between shots to change your pose. We hadn't really discussed our poses ahead of time but they came out pretty cute anyway. After you're done taking pics you get to decorate them. I think we decorated ours for like, an hour :p

Hello, boys!

Next we went downtown so we could get some lunch and also to check out the gianormous Forever 21. We got Chipotle for lunch and since it was right in the downtown you had to use a code to get into the bathroom. As proof to how intense my bathroom issues go, I can tell you two weeks later that the code was 4294. I was super excited to go to the three story F21 but for all those stories I think all I bought was a necklace and some hair bows. Everything I liked was either too pricey or not my size--boo! It was a bummer but since my carry-on was already jammed full of knick knacks it was probably for the best. While we were in F21, though, we stumbled upon another photo booth that was only $3 for 3 strips so we all three climbed in. I had wanted to see the seals in Fisherman's Wharf and ride the trolley but since I had to leave for the airport at 6pm, we just didn't have the time.

Babies <3 td="">

When Stephanie dropped me off at the airport there were lots of hugs and she said that next time I visited we'd do the things I didn't get to do this time. I was super happy that there would be a next time since I worry that I'm 100% annoying all the time. I went through security pretty quickly so I had a lot of time to kill before I boarded so I went in search of food. There weren't a lot of choices so I stopped at a coffee shop that turned out to have crepes! OMG! Tbh, I'd never really had a crepe before so I decided that today was the day. You had a choice between a sweet crepe and savory crepe and since I wasn't getting into Phoenix til 10:45pm I figured I should have a dinner crepe. I got mine with mozzarella, mushrooms, tomatoes and pesto. IT WAS FRIKKIN' AMAZING! I parked myself down and ate my yummy crepe as I scrolled through tumblr. While I was sitting there I felt really peaceful and reflected on how far I'd come with my anxiety. There was a time in my life when just the thought of going to the airport would cause a major meltdown and eating in one was completely out of the question. But there I was in San Francisco International Airport eating a massive crepe by myself cool as a cucumber. It's proof that people really can change and that life can get better. I'm so proud of myself and how strong I've become. <3 comment-3--="">

Well, thanks for reading about my little mini-adventure. I'm still counting down the days til my next one in October. I'll fill you in on that in my next post. Mwah!

Courtney and the Vortex

Sedona, Arizona

This past Saturday me and my fellow adventurer, Michelle, (and her dog, Bella) went to Sedona for the day. The weather last week was really nice and I hadn't been on a day trip since March so we spontaneously decided to go for a hike. I've been visiting Sedona nearly every year since I was a little girl (we live only 2 hours away) but I'd never really done any hiking there. My family would always go camping in Oak Creek Canyon and just bird watch and play in the creek all day. But I'd heard a lot about Sedona's vortex areas and thought it was time we checked it out. To be honest, I only had a vague idea what a vortex was. I understood that they were areas of high energy that came directly from the Earth's surface but I didn't know much beyond that. The only vortexes I had experience with were the ones in the water temple in Ocarina of Time so I was kind of expecting them to look like a pit or something. Michelle didn't really know what to expect either so we thought we'd just surprise ourselves when we got there. I did some research beforehand on which was the best trail to hike for beginners and we decided on the Boynton Canyon Trail which is 6 miles roundtrip. Before we hit the trail, though, we made a quick detour to check out the Chapel of the Holy Cross which is a church that's built right into rock face. I'm not a religious person, but it was pretty cool and the view was fantastic. We took some cute selfifes with Bella and then continued on our way.



View from the Holy Chapel of the Cross

By the time we got to the trail it had warmed up a bit but not too bad. I think it was high 70s to low 80s and there was a nice breeze going. The hike started out in the valley but eventually turned into the forest. It was cool to watch the scenery change the further we walked. One of my favorite parts of the hike were these little lilac butterflies that would all gather on the trail and when you'd walk over them they'd burst all around your feet like confetti. I honestly felt like I was in a Studio Ghibli film it was so beautiful. About 30 minutes into the hike we passed a group of ladies that had all gathered around a rock wall and were touching it a lot. We wondered if that was the vortex area but weren't really sure so we kept walking. It's hard to describe but I felt so...content this entire hike. I just felt light, peaceful and happy (which is kind of a rare feeling for me). I just couldn't stop smiling and felt like I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I'd even started my lady time that very morning and was expecting to be in terrible pain the whole day but the pain never came.



Lil desert flower

The only thing missing from this hike was the creek. I just love the sight of rushing water and it would have been wonderful to stick our feet in the creek. Other than that, it was perfect and a large majority of the trail was shaded. We had brought a few snacks so halfway through we took a short snack break and so did the mosquitos, haha. The Boynton Canyon Trail ends with a magnificent few of the canyon but since the terrain did get a little steep at the end I had to climb to the top solo. It was pretty amazing and I felt it was well worth the trip. I sat there for about 5 minutes and just stared at the beauty. I think round trip it took us about 3.5 hours which isn't bad for a 6 mile hike (and with a pupster in tow).



My hiking buddy, Michelle

When we got back to the car we were pretty starved so we stopped at Whole Foods for a bite to eat. I got a roasted veggie sandwich (with chips AND a pickle) and a peach tea. After hiking our butts off all day our sandwiches tasted AMAZING. If I had the money I'd totally retire in Sedona. It's just such a neat place and everyone seems so happy and laid back.


View at the end of the Boynton Canyon Trail

Once I got home I told my dad about my experience hiking through the vortex and explained how oddly calm and content I felt throughout the hike and he said that that was the energy of the vortex affecting me. Apparently, the energy affects everyone a little differently and especially those who are really sensitive individuals (like myself). I thought that was really cool and I will definitely go hiking in Sedona again now that I know how good it makes me feel.

I recently got a fancy new camera and am just lovin's it!

In my next post I will write about this weekend's adventure (I know, I'm totally hogging all of the fun). Today I am leaving for San Francisco to visit my dear friend and fellow crafter, Miss Twinkie Chan. I haven't been to SF since I was 8 years old so I'm very excited to explore and hang out with my babe. Lots and lots of pictures to follow! And to all you papas out there, Happy Father's Day!

Phoenix Comicon 2015

Me and my fellow Zelda cosplayers were featured in the Phoenix New Times blog!

After many weeks of anticipation, the big day had finally arrived: Phoenix Comicon 2015. Last year had been my first time at Comicon and I had cosplayed as Kiki from Kiki's Delivery Service which was a big success. This year I decided to go as a character who I have loved since I was a little girl, the venerable Princess Zelda. Since I was a wee one I've always thought I'd make an adorable Zelda so this year I decided it was time to finally realize that dream.

Pretty much since last year's Comicon I've been on the lookout for the perfect hot pink dress that I could use for this cosplay but it wasn't until about 4 or 5 months ago after much searching that I managed to stumble across the perfect dress at Forever21 (and for only $15!). As much as I hate to admit it being a fiber artist, I never learned how to machine sew so I had to find something that was already made that I could embellish. When I chose this costume I didn't realize how much of a challenge it would actually be. I started accumulating all of the pieces I would need in the beginning of April (ears, spirit gum, wig, fabric, etc.) but was so intimidated by the prospect of sewing this entire costume by hand that I didn't actually start sewing until the beginning of May. Once I started working on it I felt pretty overwhelmed tbh but since I had already invested so much money into building this costume I knew I had to see it through. Luckily, May is a slow month in the crafting business so I was able to dedicate most of my free time to working on my costume. Each day I got a little closer to achieving my goal but I wouldn't end up finishing it until 11:30pm THE DAY BEFORE COMICON! Talk about cutting it close. As it would turn out the most difficult part of the costume was styling the wig. I searched and searched for a decent tutorial on it but didn't really find anything useful so I ended up just using clear elastics and magic tape to secure the ribbons but I would find out the next day that wasn't enough. (D'oh!)

The morning of Comicon was not a happy one if you want to know the truth. I'd been having a lot of family drama the week before and just wasn't in any mood to dress up and be around zillions of people all day. But after all of the hours and hours I'd put into this thing I knew I had to go. It ended up only taking me about an hour to get ready (shocking!) and after I took a few quick selfies I was out the door. Since all of my companions were already at the convention center and the panel I wanted to see started at 12pm I tried as best as I could to haul ass to the light rail station. I got there around 10:20am but had just missed the train so I had to wait (what felt like forever) for the next one. While I was standing there melting (it was 102 that day) I looked at the back of my wig and the ribbons had come undone!!!! I hadn't even gotten to Comicon yet and I was already having a wardrobe malfunction! When I got on the train I fished out my emergency kit (which consisted of a hand mirror and scotch tape) and had to completely rewrap my hair. The entire time I'm doing this two little girls were staring at me and making me very uncomfortable. When I got to the convention center I thought I'd just zip over to registration and get my badge then zoom over to the main hall and meet up with the gang. Well, to my surprise, registration wasn't where it was last year and neither was the hall where Jason Momoa was supposed to be. Being directionally challenged this was not the best situation for me to be in. Somehow I managed to find the North Hall and from there I just let Jesus take the wheel and magically walked right over to where my friends happened to be :/



Jason Momoa (photo credit: Gage Skidmore)

Heather and Jackie had managed to score us primo seats (second row) and soon we would find out that Jason's mother was actually sitting directly in front of us. I was only familiar with Jason's work on Game of Thrones so I didn't really know what to expect from his panel but he was HILARIOUS. He told great stories and was such a genuine person and extremely likeable. I'm really glad I got to see him. After his panel I had wanted to see a discussion on the work of Vic Mignogna (the voice actor) but by the time I managed to find the room it was in it was already full. There wasn't really anything else I was interested in seeing so I just walked around and continued to get lost. While I was wandering around I got fist bumped by numerous little kids which was pretty cool. I personally think Skyward Sword is one of the best Zelda games to date but I guess it was mostly kids who bought it since most of the adults didn't seem to know who I was supposed to be. It was really cool bumping into other Zelda cosplayers and getting pictures with them. After I walked around the exhibition hall for an hour I decided to take a break and eat my snack (I'd just brought a protein bar since my stomach gets upset when I'm around crowds). By about 4pm I was feeling pretty lonely and decided to go find my friends again. I thought if I waited outside the main hall that eventually someone I knew would come out and I was right. Lauren found me and said that she was meeting Maddie to see an author speak. I didn't know who he was but I tagged along anyway. Boy, am I glad I did because this author was the best part of my day. His name was James A. Owen (the author of "Drawing Out the Dragons") and he was delightful. As soon as he came in the room he said that unlike other authors, he wasn't going to just pitch his book for an hour, instead he was going to talk about how he became successful in his career and how it might inspire us to follow our dreams too. As you might remember earlier in this post I started my day feeling pretty down and by the end of Mr. Owen's panel I was feeling 100%. He was so inspiring and had overcome so many obstacles in his life and I was hanging on his every word. My favorite thing that he said was, "If there's something you really want to do, no one can stop you. If there's something you really don't want to do, no one can help you." I felt like the Universe had led me to this discussion and I was exactly where I was supposed to be. Since then I've been in such a better mood. We all have the power to achieve whatever we set our minds to and that includes me :)

After that we went back to the exhibition hall again. I was really good and only bought fries and a Gatorade (I was mega dehydrated). We were burned out around 7pm and on our way out we saw a little kid dressed as Link. Maddie and Lauren told me to go over and get a picture with him and he was SO CUTE. While we were taking our picture 3 other Zelda cosplayers asked if they could get a picture with me too. I remember a whole bunch of people taking a picture of us at once but didn't really notice who they were since people rando people had been taking my picture all day. Two days later my friend Julie messages me and tells me that our pic was featured in the Phoenix New Times blog. I was so stoked! It made me feel like all of my hard work on this costume had really paid off. Now I need to get back to brainstorming ideas for next year's cosplay. Thanks for reading! XOXO!

Mercury in Retrograde

President of the Sad Girls Club

Things have been...weird lately. I've had two moods for the past week--sad or mad and it's made being at work very difficult since the majority of my job is me being a smiling face to greet everyone and help them with their problems. But what about Courtney's problems, huh? What about that? Thank the gods I have a handful of really good friends that I've been able to talk to about my moodiness this week or I wouldn't know what to do. As I've gotten older (and wiser) I've gotten to the point where it's easier to identify who my true friends are. I may have my down days but I love myself enough now to know when I'm not being treated right. I was talking to my friend at work and she was telling me that I'm way too smart of a lady to allow anyone to make me feel like I'm not good enough or successful enough to be their friend. And although I know this in my heart it's good to hear it from someone else, ya know? Once I turned 30 something inside me just clicked and I was just done with people's bullshit. I can't stomach phony people anymore. I only want to have people in my life who are real and who I can really share things with. I don't have time for "fair weather" friends who are only there when things are good. Life is hard and you need to have people in your life who you can count on and who can rely on you. I heard a quote once that said, "A good friend will help you move. A true friend will help you move a body." Now that's a little extreme, but you get the idea.

In other news, last weekend Michelle and I went on our first "new bf 2k15" mission and it was kind of a bust. Hanging out at her house and talking before we went out was awesome but then we went to The Duce. Normally we go in a group of 4 or more people but this time it was just the two of us and it was a totally different vibe. First we just sat down and chatted because we weren't feeling the song that was playing. While we were sitting there two guys approached us and I just got really weird and uncomfortable. Maybe it would've been different if they'd been cute but idk, as soon as they approached us all I wanted was for them to go away. That's when I realized that maybe this isn't the best route for me to take. Having one of my best friends witnessing how awkward and shy I get around boys was the WORST because I'm a totally different person with my friends than I am around strangers (especially male strangers). Eventually a song we liked was playing so we danced for a bit but then they played a lousy song and everyone dispersed from the dance floor. I did a quick scan of the place and didn't fancy any of the boys so we decided to check out Crescent Ballroom instead. There wasn't a DJ or any shows going on so everyone was hanging out on the patio. I got a bottle of Coke like a major dweeb and we found a spot to hang out and chat. Again, I just felt uncomfortable and out of place. Bars just aren't my scene and I felt like I wasn't able to give Michelle my full attention because I was trying to patrol for cuties at the same time. Michelle is one of my favorite people in the whole world and I started to resent this bar for taking my attention away from her and our conversation. Anyway, I got home around 1am and in a pretty discouraged mood.

I try to be in tune with the Universe and be conscious when it's trying to communicate something to me and I felt very strongly that night that bars and clubs aren't the place I'm going to find my match in. But where the heck is he? I was talking to Melissa about this quandary and she said that this dude needs to put in some bloody work too, that it shouldn't be 100% my responsibility to find him. I'm a very special girl and I shouldn't have to work so hard to find a decent man. However, then I think to myself, "Maybe the reason I keep running into dead ends with men here is because I'm looking in the wrong place. Maybe there's a reason I've developed such a wanderlust lately. Perhaps I'm meant to meet my person during my travels." (I can be a hopeless romantic at times).

So anyway, the moral of this story is that I've discovered bars aren't the way to go but not to lose hope entirely. I think for next month's outing we'll try joining a Meetup group or something.

Before I close, I'd 'd like to list 3 things that have happened recently that have made me happy since this happens to be Mental Health Awareness Week:

1.) It's a small victory but I beat my buddies at Mario Kart three times in a row last night. It made me feel really good after having such a poop day.
2.) I bought myself some super cute sandals that look just like a pair I had when I was little.
3.) A senior at work told me on Tuesday that I was one of the kindest people she knows

Well, that's all for now. I hope you are enjoying your Thursday and in case you're not, hang in there! We've almost made it to the weekend :)

Operation New Boyfriend

Okay, I'm going to be real here (I'm always pretty real but now I'm going to be extra real)...my love life is not something to be desired. If you look at me and think that I'm the kind of girl who has to shake men off with a stick, well, you'd be wrong. It's not like boys don't pay attention to me, I do tend to attract a fair number of men but rarely is it someone I'd actually be interested in dating (like I'd have a better chance at being abducted by aliens and then dating one of the aliens tbh). If you want to know the truth, I've only ever had one boyfriend and since then I've had a difficult time trusting men (it was a p toxic/emotionally abusive relationship). The few men that I've gone out with since have been pretty cruddy at best. Most of them were just using me to make other girls (ie ex girlfriends) jealous which is 100% uncool. It's just been one disappointment after another until I got to the point where it felt like a waste of my time. That's when I decided to find happiness on my own and not rely on a man to make me happy. In that respect, the last few years have been very successful. I started my own business and found an art form that I love, I've made lots of new friends both in real life and online, I've started travelling the world and seeing places I once only dreamed of, and most importantly, I really started to love myself. I've struggled with depression for most of my life and was once riddled with insecurities but these years on my own have been years of self acceptance and discovery. I'm on the path to becoming the woman I always wanted to be and now that I'm doing so well in the Courtney department I've realized how nice it would be to meet someone truly special at this stage of my life.

But here's the problem...

It's hard to meet someone when you work two jobs, help take care of your elderly parents, exercise regularly, have innumerable hobbies, and lots of friends (for once) who you devote all of your spare time to. Thinking back on it, I don't think I've been on a date since August...of 2013! That date was so bad it really put me off dating, well, until now. But idk, I just don't meet a lot of boys my age in my everyday life. It doesn't help that I'm naturally kind of a homebody either...

So I decided that something has to be done about this situation. The hermit life isn't working for me and the online dating scene hasn't worked for me either so it's time to try the old-fashioned way of actually leaving my house and socializing with other human beings. That sounds so Sci-fi!

My dearest, Michelle, has agreed to be my wingman(woman?) and at least once a month we're going to go out and check out some new places. I've done some research on some cool places to hang out in the valley so we've got some venues to peruse for the next few months. I don't know if this experiment will actually result in a new relationship but it couldn't hurt. And this way I can say that I'm at least putting some effort into meeting someone new. So cross your fingers for your friend, Courtney, that the Universe has somebody in mind to be her new sweetie. It would be a crime for such a cutie to be single FOREVER.

Thank you, bbs! XOXOXOXO!

Birthday Baby

Birthday Princess

Yesterday I turned 31 years old and it was a very good day. It doesn't feel like an entire year has gone by already since my last birthday (which I was lucky enough to spend in Europe with my best friend). Looking back, the year I turned 30 was probably the best year of my life thus far. In one year I visited 6 new countries and had countless adventures. Before this past year I'd never been out of the United States but now I'm a world traveler! I have fallen madly in love with adventure and I think this love affair will last for the rest of my life. There are so many places I want to see and cultures I want to experience firsthand. But for now, I'd like to take some time to reflect on some things that I learned in my 30th year on this planet.

#1.) Love yourself. This is VERY important. For most of my life I've struggled with truly loving myself. I was always my worst critic and put so much pressure on myself to be "perfect" (which I know is totally unrealistic but is pretty common for people who have anxiety disorder). But this past year I decided to really try to love and accept myself the way that I am. I've been trying to see myself how your best friend sees you. When my friends tell me about all their insecurities and things they don't like about themselves I'm always shocked and want to tell them how beautiful and perfect and amazing they are. I don't see these flaws, I just see a person who I love and think is pretty terrific so I've been trying to see myself that way too. It's weird how your entire perception of life changes when you decide to start loving yourself. In the past when I'd look at my reflection all I could see were things I wanted to change. My ears were too big, my skin had too many imperfections, my hair color was too boring, my bust was too small, etc. But now...Now when I look at myself I see princess, a goddess, a celestial being who is just oh-so-CUTE! I wonder how did I ever see anything otherwise? Of course there are days when I feel negative but they're much more infrequent than they once were.




Birthday Dress & Flower Crown

#2.) Surround yourself with positive people and remove any toxic relationships from your life. The truth is that life is very short and you only get to do it once, so if you're not getting what you need from a relationship and that relationship is no longer adding to the enjoyment and quality of your life, it might be time to let it go. Relationships like people, change over time and just because you've been friends with someone for a long time doesn't mean that you're always going to be compatible. This past year I had to remove some negative influences from my life and although it was hard, I think it was ultimately the right decision. These people weren't treating me the way I know I deserved and weren't making me feel good about myself when I was with them. They made me feel like I wasn't good enough and that I needed to change who I was. Since these people have exited my life, I feel like a tremendous weight has been lifted from my shoulders. For the first time in my life I'm surrounded by people who I truly love (and who love me) and enjoy being around. These people support me and inspire me everyday. They make me laugh and are also there for me when I'm feeling down. It's important to find friends who are there for you even when life gets complicated. As a person who struggles with depression, I need people in my life who understand that I'm not always going to happy and bubbly. There are days where I'm going to be a bummer but it means so much to know that even when I feel moody or sad that my friends still love me and are there to talk when I need them. They say that misery loves company but I think that the same can be said about positivity. Surrounding yourself with positive people can really help you to become a more positive person. I've noticed that now that I'm hanging out with positive folks that my attitude has changed a lot. I've absorbed their good vibes and positive energy and instead of just complaining about everything like I used to, I'm laughing and dancing and having fun. It's pretty awesome :)

#3.) Collect experiences, not things. Now this is the hardest one and I'll admit I struggle with it daily. Like I said earlier, people are continually growing and changing and as an artist, I like to express those changes externally with the clothes and makeup I wear. But there comes a point where you realize that with only two days off a week, how are you physically going to be able to wear all of this stuff? And I've heard that the average person only wears 11% of their wardrobe anyway so I need to get a hold of myself and stop buying so much clothes. I come from a family of hoarders so it's going to be challenge to stop collecting things and spending my money on junk I don't really need. Ideally, I'd like to start living a more minimalistic lifestyle and spend my money on travel and not stuff. But as I said, it's not going to be an easy task but now that I've started traveling I'm seeing how much happiness I'm getting from those experiences vs acquiring more material possessions.

So yeah, some very heavy life lessons were learned this past year and I'm hoping to continue to develop and grow this year as well and am very much looking forward to all of the adventures to come.

Baby's First Art Fair

This happened forever and a day ago but since I hadn't finished my travel stories yet, I thought I'd wait to blog about my art show. It was at Monarch Theatre last month and I showed with 42 other local artists. This was my first show as Iggy Starpup so I was very excited/nervous. I spent 2 months preparing so there was a lot of pressure for the show to be a success. For the most part, I'd say it was. The only exception was that I got SUPER sick the day before. Exactly 24 hours prior to the show I woke up with the flu (and I hadn't had the flu in many many years). It was probably a combination of stress and the fact that everyone I worked with was sick but the timing couldn't have been worse. If I hadn't had already sold all of my tickets to my friends I think I would've just backed out to be honest. But I felt an enormous amount of guilt bailing at the last minute. The morning of the show I took some Dayquil first thing after I woke up and by the grace of Glob, it actually worked. Within 30 minutes I felt better. Within an hour I thought, "I can maybe possibly do this." I had to be at the theatre at 2pm and since it was downtown, my dad gave me a lift. He was really worried about me and tried really hard to convince me to not go. It wasn't easy have to socialize with so many people for hours on end but I'm glad I went.

The show didn't start until 7pm so I was a little taken a back when they told us we had to be there at 2pm but our director assured us that we would need all of that time to set up and get photographed. I think it took me about 2 hours total to set up my booth but I did have to wait an hour for someone to help me set up my grid panel (I didn't have a boyfriend/husband to help me set up--I had to do everything myself) so I did end up doing a lot of waiting around. I popped some more Dayquil before they opened the doors and just told myself that I had to get through this. It helped build my confidence that a fellow artist bought a piece of mine before the show even started. Luckily I'd had the good sense to bring a chair with me, though, because there was no way I would've been able to stand for so many hours.

The show went from 7-11pm so it was a long day but it meant so much to me to see all of my friends there to support me. Some were only able to stay for a bit but knowing that they took the time to come downtown to support me and my art meant the world. It was super cool to watch people's face too as they made their way over to my booth. Everyone's faces went from mild interest to delight. I watched them as their eyes jumped from hoop to hoop and as they recognized characters they knew. It was very cool. Our director had told us to anticipate being at the theatre until 1am but I was positive it wouldn't run that long since it was a Thursday and things had thinned out by 10pm. We wrapped up around 10:45pm and I was home by 11:30pm. Even now, I don't know how I got through it being as sick as I was. Just looking at the photographs it's hard to tell that I was even sick but I guess that means I did a pretty good job with my makeup, haha.

In other art news, things have been going pretty well with my shop. I got interviewed recently for an article on a crafting blog and a crafting hero of mine, Twinkie-Chan, purchased one of my hoops! I've been a fan of hers for many many years so it's so cool knowing that she likes my work enough to want a piece in her home. That makes me so happy. In the past year I've befriended so many artists who I really admire and it's all thanks to social media. Even though my addiction to the internet does eat up a lot of my time, I am very grateful for the connections it's allowed me to make. In just 3 years my business has grown so much and I am excited for all of the possibilities and opportunities yet to come :)